One Month Old Already?

Ryan is already changing... Jill sent me these pics this weekend. I cant believe how different he looks. What a doll.

A Gift from Ryan

Today I received this beautiful charm from baby Ryan, engraved with his initials. He shops at Tiffany's! What a boy! It is neat to see that his parents are training him so well! (already!) I am joking, of course, but I have never received anything from Tiffany's. It was fun to open the package and find that little blue box...

I absoulutely love it, and am trying to decide if I will start a charm bracelet, or wear it as a necklace. Either way it will be fun...AND it means I get to do some shopping of my own!

Thanks Ryan!

Good News!

I went to see Dr. Klomp today, and he is very pleased with my incision. He says it is healing better than he expected, for everything we did. He also gave me the green light to be a surrogate again. What a huge weight lifted off of my heart. Yay!

I am feeling much better these days, and had a great time at the winery yesterday with Katie and Michelle. Here is a picture of us....hmm....maybe a reminder that it is time for me to get back on the weight loss wagon? Ha ha.

Today I received a letter from Jill's mom...that would be baby Ryan's Grandma. How sweet it was, and brought tears to my eyes. Thank you Verla! (Here we go with the crying again...) I wasn't expecting it, and it truly made me feel proud. It is amazing how many people's lives are touched by a child, and that is especially true when surrogacy is involved. I am happy that I was able to be a part of something so big.

Mother's Day

Whoot whoot! We all went to the Sawtooth Vineyard for a Mother's Day celebration (along with 200 other people!) and had an awesome time! Thanks Jennifer and Michelle! My shoulders got a little burned, and some lady asked me when I was due!!! (ummm...I'm six weeks post-partum.....but I am still wearing my maternity jeans, cuz they're just so comfortable!), but other than that, I think I'll do it again next year! Who's coming with me?

It's Official.

I just returned from the courthouse. Kevin and I had to appear before a judge to terminate our parental rights to Ryan. In Idaho, the woman giving birth to the baby is the legal parent, and her husband is the "presumptive father" even when there is no biological connection. When he was born, Kevin and I, along with Randy, the biological father, all signed a paternity affidavit stating that Randy is the father. This allowed him to be put on the birth certificate. Now, Randy is the only parent, Jill will have to adopt him, as a step-parent adoption. Interesting, huh? Anyway, it is all done and everything is legal.....I guess I cant change my mind now! JUST KIDDING!

One of the questions the judge asks, is how long I have considered giving up my rights to Ryan. It was nice to be able to truthfully answer, "Since before he was conceived." You know this day is coming from the minute you start the journey. It wasn't sad, and believe it or not, I didn't even cry. It is nice to know that the intended parents no longer have to worry that something might go wrong. I am sure most of them are reasonably confident, but I would imagine there could be a tiny little voice somewhere putting doubt in their mind.... Anyway, he is all theirs now, in every sense of the word. My work is officially done!

Here is another pic of Ryan....just 'cuz he is so cute. I will continue to tell the story of his birth, next time. Thanks for checking in!

Still Crying...

Good morning. It has been nearly three weeks since I delivered Ryan, and I am barely starting to feel "normal" again. It is surprising how long it takes to recover when you arent distracted by the daily routine of taking care of a newborn!

I wasnt able to drive for 2 weeks. That was pure torture. Imagine being pregnant with someone else's baby...they call your or email you every day, sometimes twice a day, so excited and waiting for the big day. Then you spend 3 days in the hospital, clebrating his arrival. Now it is time to go home, alone. The kids go back to school and your husband goes back to work...it has been very lonely. I do hear from the parents often, and they send me pics regularly. How can I expect them to call me every day when they have a completely new life now? This seems to be a normal part of recovery, and this is when a lot of tears are shed. They are not tears of sadness, really, but HORMONES! How can I fight that? I cant, so I still cry a little every day.

The pain from the c-section is nearly gone, but UGH the horrible scar! I had to have a T-shaped incision, due to difficulty getting the little guy out. My uterus was just not cooperating. So there is a vertical incision, in addition to the "bikini" cut. My uterus was cut this way as well, and the jury is still out on the matter of if I will be able to have another baby. This has also been weighing on me, heavily. I want to be a surrogate again, but I will have to defer the decision to my amazing doctor, Dr. Klomp. I will see him in a couple more weeks for my checkup, and we will discuss it then. UGH, more tears...


So that is enough sad stuff...how about some pictures! This is me with Jill and Randy, the morning of the c-section. We are waiting for it to be "time" to go upstairs. This turned out to be a decent picutre, but what a bundle of nerves we all were!





I was so impressed with the nurse, she actually got my IV in where it wasnt in the way of my wrist...that is one of my biggest pet peeves!






Jill and I were comparing our pedicures, which we went and had done together, the day before. Everything is ready to go, we are just waiting on Dr. Klomp and the OR to be ready!

Ryan

Hello! I want to introduce you to Ryan, our latest surro-baby! I gave birth on April 17. He weighed 7lb 3oz, and was 19 1/2 inches long. Just a little guy, but oh-so-cute! Stay tuned for the whole story!